SMENCILS.

How To Entertain Yourself

1) Obtain a root beer-scented colored Smencil.

2) Color a large spot on your Spanish homework.

3) Smash your face onto the paper to see if it smells good.

4) Repeat step 3 until entertained.

Satisfaction guaranteed.

EARWAX.

Hey, if you have a copy of New Moon, go grab it. Go to page 69. It's in chapter 3. Go to the paragraph that starts with "'No! This is about my soul, isn't it?!'" and read it... but every time it says the word 'soul,' replace it with the word 'earwax.' If you don't laugh hysterically, you are a heartless person with no sense of humor whatsoever. Begone from this blog, vile fiend!

Muchos gracias to Dan Bergstein for being so brilliantly hilarious: Blogging New Moon, Part 3

Birthday

Shout-out to DOGLUVER! Happy birthday and good luck with the essay! ;)

PI DAY!

OMG IT'S PI DAY! March 14... like 3/14... 3.14... get it? It's like pi?

...the ignorant math nerds of the world will be laughing hysterically right about now.

And the math nerds that are "in the know" ( :P ) will already be wearing their Pi Day hats and rolling their eyes as they say "Duh, we already knew about it, silly" as they smugly eat their pie.

Whipped cream or allergies?

My mom blew her nose and I didn't see, so I thought she was squirting whipped cream out of a can. You know, it makes that funny little air-blowing noise... I was like "What are you eati- oh, that was your nose?" It was kind of minorly hilarious.

Hmm...

Yesterday my friend and I realized that when we get older and have kids, we can tell them...

"When I was your age, Pluto was still a planet!"

"I was born before DVD players were invented!"

"I was born before Harry Potter was published!"

"I remember when no one thought vampires sparkled!"

And after SpongeBob SquarePants' 37th anniversary... "I remember seeing the promotions for SpongeBob... BEFORE THE SERIES WAS OUT!"

Do dogs burp?

Because I think mine just did.

Ew.

I really don't like essays. Also, whenever I try to look up more information on my topic (Bermuda Triangle, anyone?), I keep getting distracted by all the freaky stories. Then I get weirded out by all the freakish eyewitness accounts that are probably 80% made-up. (But they're still weird.)